I feel so far from the person I know I want to be. I've been wandering the past few years, making poor choices. I guess it's partly a delayed rebellion. I never experimented and did the trials a normal college student does, now at 25 I'm making the mistakes I should have at 18. It's still no excuse though. I'm becoming morally lazy and fragmented. I need to get back to those core values instilled in me since I was a child. You feel the most lost in life when you stray from your core. It's hard not being surrounded by the people in your life who act as your compass. Don't get me wrong, I take FULL responsibility for all my decisions and choices, I just miss having my sounding boards and "tough love" friends to pull me back onto the path when I start to waver. Core values. I need to explore what that means to me, where my center in myself is and how to use it.
I wish my compasses weren't 900 miles away.